Weekend Jottings

There are three meetings taking place this afternoon with flat fixtures from Newmarket, Hamilton and Salisbury.  It is 1,000 Guineas day at Newmarket and there is an open-looking race in store at 3.40pm.  If I was given a fiver to have a bet, I would probably side with French challenger, Malavath.  She proved her stamina when runner-up in the Breeders Cup Juvenile Fillies Turf in America in November and also her ability to handle a quick surface.  The excellent Christophe Soumillon is in the saddle and I wouldn't be at all surprised to see him land his first British Classic success.

There are no runners from the Pond House team today, although we will be back with runners at Warwick and Kempton tomorrow, so come back then to find out more.

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There are three Premiership football matches this afternoon and Everton's sorry descent to the bottom of the table looks set to continue as they host Chelsea.  Meanwhile, Spurs versus Leicester looks like a competitive game and there is a London derby too, with West Ham hosting Arsenal.  The Gunners are in a rich vein of form and may have enough to record an away win.

The final of the World Snooker Championships gets underway today in Sheffield.  The winner of the best of 35 frames contest, which will conclude tomorrow will pick up a cool £500,000, whilst the runner-up collects a cheque for £200,000.  Not bad for a couple of weeks' work.

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A man was driving home one day when a police officer tried to pull him over.  The man gradually increased his speed until he was doing over 100mph but the police officer remained hot on his tail.  Eventually realising his attempt to escape was futile, the man finally pulled over onto the hard shoulder.

The police officer got out of his vehicle and approached the car.  "It's been a long day and my shift is almost over.  So, if you can give me a legitimate excuse for your behaviour, I will let you go."

The man says, "My wife ran away with a policeman a few weeks ago and I thought you may have been trying to bring her back!"